Step away from the buffet

I hate buffet meals. No I don't mean I dislike them a bit I really really hate them. The children and DOD (Dear Old Dad) however love a buffet so in a moment of good hearted weakness I joined the ultimate buffet club - our local football club, the Broncos Leagues club. I also joined up DOD - $7.50 For pensioners. Don't judge me. In order to escape from my neighbour's 80th birthday hell - I mean party, and I use that term loosely - I invented a family occasion today and suggested to DOD that we go to lunch at the Broncos. He was thrilled. I made the booking at midday in order to still get that afternoon rest in. For DOD of course. *coughs. It was packed. Full of people lining up to eat very average overpriced and reheated meals. DOD packed it in - soup, roast main and two desserts. I managed two glasses of wine ( so much for dry July), a plate of hideous Chinese like food, and a chocolate ice cream cone. Plus a few chocolate freckles. And chocolate bullets loathing myslf the whoie time The only good thing about this sort of lunch for DOD is that he can make himself a boiled egg for dinner and I can relax in the late afternoons But the place was packed. Not a table to be had. And as i lined up to get my overpriced overheated and average food there were many times I wanted to shout 'step away from the buffet' to those who clearly should not eat at this sort of 'all the crap you can eat' establishments. I could understand it if the food was priced for what it was but it wasn't. I watched one woman hold a large dinner plate with a selection of each of 10 different desserts. The confusion on her face when she came to the custard and ice cream was classic. Where would they both go? On the side, all over the top, or was a separate plate required? She finally settled on the separate plate. Delicious! As we were leaving we passed a table with an elderly lady in a wheel chair sporting a helium balloon with 90 in large numerals on it just to make sure everyone there knew she was 90. 'happy birthday' I said as I walked past. She gave me a look which said to me she would rather be dead than celebrating where she was Ugh AMFYOYO