So did I do the right thing or the wrong thing?

I am a believer in performing random acts of kindness - for people I know or complete strangers, it matters not. I get a wonderful feeling when I have helped someone who needs it without being asked.

So late Wednesday afternoon as the rain started to fall, I poured a glass of wine, reclined on the couch, assuming that Harry's soccer training would be cancelled. Call me a bad mother but not having to get in the car to drive one of my 3 children anywhere has become the highlight of my life. However it was not to be. My phone went 'bing' and there was a text from the team manager. Although it was raining, the boys would be having fitness training, on the concrete, underneath the clubhouse. Fuck fuck fuck ( I should add that when Harry came home later he was soaking wet, and muddy and shivering so I'm not sure how much of the fitness training was under cover)

Anyhoo - back to my random act of kindness.

After I resentfully dropped Harry off knowing I had to get up off my arse in an hour to pick him up, I noticed a young man, in school uniform, walking with hunched shoulders against the now bucketing rain. I wound down my window and asked him if he needed a lift home. His eyes lit up and accepted and was very profuse in his thanks. He got in the car, and I offered him my phone, and asked if he wanted to call anyone to let them know he was getting a lift home but he declined. It would have been a 20 minute walk home given the distance and we chatted - he was in year 12, hoping to get into engineering etc etc. He asked about my son and soccer. We got to his house and he once again thanked me for the lift home.

I had a warm and fuzzy feeling. Until The Lawyer got home. I told him about my random act of kindness. He was furious with me. He said he would be livid If either of our sons accepted a lift home with a complete stranger (no matter how cute). He could not believe I had put myself in danger offering a lift to a young man I didn't know.

He went on and on and on. I see his point but I was completely deflated. I want to find that young man and shake him and say 'what were you thinking?'. I want to shake my husband and say 'what an awful world we live in where I can't feel like I can offer a lift to a kid, albeit a grown up kid, a lift home in the rain'. What have we become?

So did I do the right thing? Was he overreacting? What would you have done?

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How did I become a slave in my own palace?

I have three delightful children. When I say delightful I mean this description comes to me from other people with whom they have come into contact because usually at home they are not what I would describe as delightful. Unless there is only one of them home at a time. Which doesn't happen very often.


Anyhoo, it is school and university holidays at present. Which seems to involve a lot of lying about on couches, watching tv, playing the x box, Wii, or on a laptop 'talking' to friends.  It does not, however appear to involve anyone asking the very simple yet effective question 'would you like me to help you with anything, mum?' as I run around like a blue arsed fly catering meals, ensuring that the jeans they wore for two hours are washed clean again, driving them hither and yon, and generally being a doormat.


To be fair, Harry my youngest, has now taken to asking this question because yesterday I lost my mind, screamed and stamped my feet so much I had a small bladder leakage problem, and stormed off, sending myself to my room.


The reason for this outburst was something which has happened before many times but I had reached the limit of my endurance. HOW DID I BECOME A SLAVE IN MY OWN PALACE????!!!


I was out taking Billy to have his first drivers licence test (in qld they like everyone to do it twice it seems) and had to leave a load of washing to finish. Elle was on her way home from the boyfriend's house where she had spent the previous two days so I called her and told her that there was washing in the machine and asked her to hang one of the flannelette sheets over the patio table in the full sun seeing as the clothes line didn't get much sun.


When I got home she had hung said flannelette sheet out - and the washing machine was still full of wet sheets and dooms covers. Wtf? Her excuse was that she thought I wanted the rest to go into the dryer. So why not put them in? I lost it. Both boys were by this stage on couches tvs on, she was in her bedroom which looks like a candidate for hoarders. 'I could be married to you if you're going to be so thoughtless' I screamed at her. Oh dear that's a bit of a giveaway.


I flounced off to cool down of a few minutes. They all looked slightly terrified I was going to have an aneurism.


I reeled off a list of jobs. Washing to be hung out. Dry washing to be brought in and folded. Bins to be brought up from the road. Recycling to be taken out. Three animals to be fed. Mail to be collected. And I shouted 'I refuse to be a slave in my own palace'. Then just for good measure I added, with a tiny bit more shrill in my voice 'and I am having the tattoo on my forehead that says 'doormat' removed.' then I poured myself a large glass of wine trying not to feel guilty about failing dry July on both the 1st and 2nd days of the month.


Seriously how did this happen? How did I allow my children to become these people. And my husband, who when I say 'could you put the kettle on' does just that and then wanders off. I seem to be responsible for everything big and small that needs doing. Well not anymore. I am going to get a poster made with my new slogan and put it up in each room of the house and start exercising my 'no' muscles


AMFYOYO